I’ve often written about how I would like to see more original games, games that move away from (what is to me) the tired genre of First-Person Shooters (FPSes). It’s not that I always dislike FPSes, but I do want more from a game than just running around and shooting. I seek out games that make me feel something: fear, joy, connection with a character, anything. And, I have found a lot of games that do this: Rayman Legends is so joyful; Outlast terrified me; and games like Life is Strange allow me to connect with the characters. I’m open to a lot of different games and ways of connecting with games. The two games I played this weekend Nevermind and Her Story both made me feel lonely in the game, but for very different reasons using very different tactics.
Feeling lonely in a game isn’t new to me, but as I played both of these games, I started thinking back to other games that invoke loneliness in a variety of ways. When I think back over games that I have loved, I realize I’m attracted to games that invoke a feeling of loneliness, and often one of hopeless loneliness. I remember this feeling of hopeless loneliness while playing both Limbo and Among the Sleep. The main characters in both Limbo and Among the Sleep are children, which for me further added to the feeling of loneliness and hopelessness. Thinking about those games, I think I’m attracted to the desperate atmosphere because I find it immersive, and it makes me feel something about the game, makes the game stick with me.
When I started playing Nevermind this weekend, loneliness was the first thing I felt. I’ve written about Nevermind before, but the game involves getting inside client’s minds and trying to figure out their story and solve their personal mystery. The game is in early access, and the developers just released a new client. The new client’s story starts off in an abandoned city during the day, which in and of itself didn’t make me feel lonely as I’ve played a lot of zombie games that felt similar. But, fairly quickly, it becomes night in the same abandoned city, and I started hearing distant noises: honking, whispered or barely discernable conversations, and some kind of really creepy skittering noises behind me. Add to that the ghostly apparitions and very effective use of silhouettes in windows that made me feel watched and very, very alone. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to progress very far with this client because there is a known bug. The developers offered a work around, but I think I’ll just wait for the patch. In the meantime, I imagine the setup in this client’s story will stick with me as one of the times I’ve felt very alone in a game.
With my progress halted in Nevermind, I switched to Her Story. In this game, you watch interviews with a woman about her missing husband. Alisha has written quite a bit about the game, so I won’t rehash what she has already written about. But, I immediately felt lonely in an entirely different way and for entirely different reasons in this game. I first felt lonely as I watched the initial videos of the woman talking about her husband. Of the videos I’ve seen so far, it’s just the woman talking. She’s clearly talking to someone else in the room, but there is rarely much evidence that anyone is there. I think so far the only actual evidence I’ve found of someone else in the room is when they clap after a strange performance. I felt the weight of being alone in an interview room with people who are, in fact, looking to hold what you say against you. Then, as the game progressed I felt her overall loneliness and neediness. I haven’t figure out exactly what the story is yet, and from reading on the internet, I see I probably never will, but the sense that this woman is alone and has always been alone really stood out to me. Her contradictions, her stories, and her mannerisms all contributed to the feeling that this woman is very alone, and I felt that along with her.
Both of these games this weekend left me with a bit of melancholy. But, I don’t mind that. Most of the time, I would much rather engage with a game that leaves me feeling and thinking long after I’ve put it down. I imagine I will be spending more time digging into Her Story this weekend while I wait patiently for Nevermind to work out the bugs. Cheers to games that make me feel something and the (often independent) developers that make that happen.
